Excuse me but is that the Sistine Chapel on your wrists?
No, I thought not. Dumb question. You wouldn't want to smell like an antique ceiling any more than I would. You want to smell beautiful, and you would like that beauty to be pleasant, attractive and to be something that you would be willing to repeat time and time again.
Sick of minimalism? Does minimalist clothing, furniture, food or freedoms get on your last nerve? Me too. I am a maximalist. I want more. I love collecting books, perfumes, household objects, plants and jewelry. Most of all I prize my Constitutional freedoms and choices. I do not want to be told what to do, what to read, what to eat or what to believe. I don't want to work hard and give it all away to fund someone else's idea of fairness.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Friday, April 18, 2008
And Your Perfume Wears Army Boots! The New Guide.
It must be nice to believe that your taste in anything is "definitive" that your choices are so authoritative as to be the final word on the subject.
Perhaps one can make that claim if one is a Supreme Court Justice, but even then you need the agreement of four independant colleagues before your opinion becomes definitive.
If you are an Emperor you do not need the agreement of anyone and the Emperor of Scent, Luca Turin, has written a new book, a definitive guide to fragrance, which purports to elevate his opinion to the final word on hundreds of perfumes. This Napoleon has his Jospehine in Tania Sanchez, his new wife, with whom he shared the task of rating these fragrances, but the book was probably published due to the Emperors's reputation not hers.
The first part of the book starts out well enough with a history of fragrance and some short essays on various aspects of perfumery. The Emperor's writing is informative and a joy to read. Fine and dandy.
Then we get to the Michelin section of the book, an alphabetical listing of fragrances, a one to five star rating, and a TS or LT "review". Unlike Michelin which includes establishments that are deemed very good to exceptional, the Turin/Sanchez guide opts to sink to the level of an internet bash board and savage everything they do not like as "air freshener", "wet dog" or some other pejorative.
The authors have appeared on the blogs to describe their work as essentially a starting point for discussion on the merits of fragrances and probably to inhibit criticism of their own work. (Many of the boards treat celebrity posters as saints who are exempt from the scathing critiques they themselves dish out. Having an author post on your board or blog lends cache to your site so chasing them away or criticising them is frowned upon. Some say that criticising authors who appear for the sole purpose of defending their work is "being mean to one of our members", but this rings false and I do not see Guerlain, Montale and Caron sending posters to the blogs in order to shield their work from criticism. Maybe they should. The bloggers are easily starstruck)
Anyway let's look at the discussion aspect for a moment. If someone says "your taste sucks" how likely are you to have a pleasant and fruitful conversation with this person? If you are equally rude, you will yell back. If you are a passive sort of person you will skulk off and wear your Tabac Blond in private. If you are a psychiatrist you might delve into the motivation behind the need to score points at another's expense and examine the hostility behind such wit. In an inpatient setting you might even write an order so that the nurse can toss a mood stabilizer or some inderal in with the HS meds.
Michelin steers clear of scratching the eyes out of restauranteurs whose product is not "very good". The Turin/Sanchez guide shows why Michelin has been around for over a century. Michelin knows the difference between constructive criticism and wisecracks. By including only the better establishments it can give the mediocre something to aim for without devastating them. The LT/TS approach is mean spirited.
Apparently, despite the frequent snide reviews, this was a "pay to play" effort and perfume houses had to pony up bottles of fragrance in order to be included in the roast. I don't see why they bothered. There are so many blogs and boards out there who will provide more thoughtful reviews without this expense, small though it may have been. Many houses obviously provided Turin and Sanchez with the requested materials, others did not and were excluded. Smart move Montale.
On Perfume of Life's message board a poster referred to the Turin/Sanchez guide as porn. Porn allows you to take vicarious pleasure at watching someone else get screwed. This poster was right on the money. Not my taste at all.
Perhaps one can make that claim if one is a Supreme Court Justice, but even then you need the agreement of four independant colleagues before your opinion becomes definitive.
If you are an Emperor you do not need the agreement of anyone and the Emperor of Scent, Luca Turin, has written a new book, a definitive guide to fragrance, which purports to elevate his opinion to the final word on hundreds of perfumes. This Napoleon has his Jospehine in Tania Sanchez, his new wife, with whom he shared the task of rating these fragrances, but the book was probably published due to the Emperors's reputation not hers.
The first part of the book starts out well enough with a history of fragrance and some short essays on various aspects of perfumery. The Emperor's writing is informative and a joy to read. Fine and dandy.
Then we get to the Michelin section of the book, an alphabetical listing of fragrances, a one to five star rating, and a TS or LT "review". Unlike Michelin which includes establishments that are deemed very good to exceptional, the Turin/Sanchez guide opts to sink to the level of an internet bash board and savage everything they do not like as "air freshener", "wet dog" or some other pejorative.
The authors have appeared on the blogs to describe their work as essentially a starting point for discussion on the merits of fragrances and probably to inhibit criticism of their own work. (Many of the boards treat celebrity posters as saints who are exempt from the scathing critiques they themselves dish out. Having an author post on your board or blog lends cache to your site so chasing them away or criticising them is frowned upon. Some say that criticising authors who appear for the sole purpose of defending their work is "being mean to one of our members", but this rings false and I do not see Guerlain, Montale and Caron sending posters to the blogs in order to shield their work from criticism. Maybe they should. The bloggers are easily starstruck)
Anyway let's look at the discussion aspect for a moment. If someone says "your taste sucks" how likely are you to have a pleasant and fruitful conversation with this person? If you are equally rude, you will yell back. If you are a passive sort of person you will skulk off and wear your Tabac Blond in private. If you are a psychiatrist you might delve into the motivation behind the need to score points at another's expense and examine the hostility behind such wit. In an inpatient setting you might even write an order so that the nurse can toss a mood stabilizer or some inderal in with the HS meds.
Michelin steers clear of scratching the eyes out of restauranteurs whose product is not "very good". The Turin/Sanchez guide shows why Michelin has been around for over a century. Michelin knows the difference between constructive criticism and wisecracks. By including only the better establishments it can give the mediocre something to aim for without devastating them. The LT/TS approach is mean spirited.
Apparently, despite the frequent snide reviews, this was a "pay to play" effort and perfume houses had to pony up bottles of fragrance in order to be included in the roast. I don't see why they bothered. There are so many blogs and boards out there who will provide more thoughtful reviews without this expense, small though it may have been. Many houses obviously provided Turin and Sanchez with the requested materials, others did not and were excluded. Smart move Montale.
On Perfume of Life's message board a poster referred to the Turin/Sanchez guide as porn. Porn allows you to take vicarious pleasure at watching someone else get screwed. This poster was right on the money. Not my taste at all.
A Tale of Two Parties: Fragrance Manufacturers BEWARE!
In these days of niche scents and blogs dedicated to championing the most expensive and exotic perfumes one would think that olfactory thrill seekers made up the majority of fragrance wearers and that unusual, foreign, complicated and titillating was "where it's at" when it comes to eau de toilette. If you read perfume blogs, as I do, you know that aficionados of both sexes agonize over what to buy and what to wear on specific occasions such as garden parties, weddings, corporate events and trips to the dentist. If you read these blogs often enough you come to think that this is normal behavior and you will wonder if people will think less of you if you do not wear Serge Luten's Rousse to a retirement tea at the office.
Last month I went to two events and spent time planning out exactly what scent I should wear to each. Needless to say I fantasized that I would meet kindred spirits and that we would compliment each others' fine taste and that my choices would be roundly admired by women eager to learn more about scent.
Here's what happened:
Party number one was a large catered event in a posh and secluded neighborhood outside of NYC. The white tents were attached to the house and the servers were decked out in white jackets and bow ties. They wore white gloves. The music was live and I expected Daisy and Tom Buchanan to sweep in at any moment.
My fellow revellers were professionals, well dressed, well coiffed and well off. We talked about music, art and real estate. People discussed recent trips to Paris, Prague and Barbados. Naturally, this group would appreciate my choice of the sophisticated absinthe scent Douce Amere by the trendy Mr. Lutens. I bided my time.
Finally, I heard the words I longed for, "what is that fabulous perfume you're wearing?" I did not answer right away and that was a good thing. The question was not directed to me and Serge and our spicy wormwood fragrance. Nope. I took a deep breath of disappointment and inhaled a bright sparkling floral with plenty of sillage, a floral laced with strands of sandalwood and patchouli. It was womanly and classic and the woman who wore it was prominent, well-known to all the guests for her tireless charity fundraising and easily able to purchase whatever she desired. I joined the chorus of the interested as she reached into her bag and produced an iridescent bottle of----------AVON RARE PEARLS!
You read this correctly. The scent that drew the attention not accorded my Douce Amere or the Hermes Jardin du Nil I had caught wind of earlier in the afternoon was a $12.00 bottle of Avon. If it was attention I wanted I could have got it and saved myself $108.00.
Event number two came several days later and was the aforementioned retirement tea for one of our VPs at work. The setting was the usual dining room decked out in balloons and the fare was coffee, tea and cake. This was not the occasion for Douce Amere so I chose La Chasse Aux Papillons by L'Artisan Parfumeur. I had learned the lesson of the previous affair, chose a gorgeous floral, and refreshed it before I entered the room to ensure sillage.
Nothing. Not a peep about my scent. But yes, again another scent caught some attention. A former employee came late to say her farewells to her ex-boss. Being a new stay at home mom, she was casually dressed and smelled fresh and clean in a muguet based fruity floral. The guest of honor said "maybe this is inappropriate, but you smell sexy," to her former subordinate. Everyone laughed. The wearer of this sexy scent was "embarrassed" to say what the fragrance was but we got it out of her. Are you sitting down? Then sit down, perfumistas and get the smelling salts ready. The sensuous scent sensation was------Paris Hilton! I'd have been embarrassed too. In her case it was hard to blurt out the name Paris Hilton, in my case it would have hurt to admit to a mainstream mass market scent.
But why? Because I have trained myself to trust the taste of a rarified group of collectors who yearn for niche brands. Yes, I "appreciate the art" behind these fragrant masterpieces but most men and women haven't a clue that this perfume blogosphere exists. They walk into a department store or perfume discounter and buy what they honestly and truly like and what is popular. This is not neurosurgery, this is common sense. People buy Rare Pearls and Paris Hilton because they like how they smell not because they have come to comprehend the artistic vision of "le nez".
So fragrance manufacturers and marketers are you listening? Do not be swayed by the blog chorus of those looking for something rare and amazing. Pay attention to your current sales figures and satisfy your market. Your market does not want to remind their friends of that bleak Degas painting of absinthe addicts housed in the Musee d'Orsay in Paris. They want to smell sexy and clean.
Come on Estee Lauder and Coty, you can do it!
(And just in case you're listening those perfumistas you're courting frequently buy and live off samples, free samples, hundreds of them. The people you are looking for would not have the nerve to ask for a decant. They do not know what it is)
Last month I went to two events and spent time planning out exactly what scent I should wear to each. Needless to say I fantasized that I would meet kindred spirits and that we would compliment each others' fine taste and that my choices would be roundly admired by women eager to learn more about scent.
Here's what happened:
Party number one was a large catered event in a posh and secluded neighborhood outside of NYC. The white tents were attached to the house and the servers were decked out in white jackets and bow ties. They wore white gloves. The music was live and I expected Daisy and Tom Buchanan to sweep in at any moment.
My fellow revellers were professionals, well dressed, well coiffed and well off. We talked about music, art and real estate. People discussed recent trips to Paris, Prague and Barbados. Naturally, this group would appreciate my choice of the sophisticated absinthe scent Douce Amere by the trendy Mr. Lutens. I bided my time.
Finally, I heard the words I longed for, "what is that fabulous perfume you're wearing?" I did not answer right away and that was a good thing. The question was not directed to me and Serge and our spicy wormwood fragrance. Nope. I took a deep breath of disappointment and inhaled a bright sparkling floral with plenty of sillage, a floral laced with strands of sandalwood and patchouli. It was womanly and classic and the woman who wore it was prominent, well-known to all the guests for her tireless charity fundraising and easily able to purchase whatever she desired. I joined the chorus of the interested as she reached into her bag and produced an iridescent bottle of----------AVON RARE PEARLS!
You read this correctly. The scent that drew the attention not accorded my Douce Amere or the Hermes Jardin du Nil I had caught wind of earlier in the afternoon was a $12.00 bottle of Avon. If it was attention I wanted I could have got it and saved myself $108.00.
Event number two came several days later and was the aforementioned retirement tea for one of our VPs at work. The setting was the usual dining room decked out in balloons and the fare was coffee, tea and cake. This was not the occasion for Douce Amere so I chose La Chasse Aux Papillons by L'Artisan Parfumeur. I had learned the lesson of the previous affair, chose a gorgeous floral, and refreshed it before I entered the room to ensure sillage.
Nothing. Not a peep about my scent. But yes, again another scent caught some attention. A former employee came late to say her farewells to her ex-boss. Being a new stay at home mom, she was casually dressed and smelled fresh and clean in a muguet based fruity floral. The guest of honor said "maybe this is inappropriate, but you smell sexy," to her former subordinate. Everyone laughed. The wearer of this sexy scent was "embarrassed" to say what the fragrance was but we got it out of her. Are you sitting down? Then sit down, perfumistas and get the smelling salts ready. The sensuous scent sensation was------Paris Hilton! I'd have been embarrassed too. In her case it was hard to blurt out the name Paris Hilton, in my case it would have hurt to admit to a mainstream mass market scent.
But why? Because I have trained myself to trust the taste of a rarified group of collectors who yearn for niche brands. Yes, I "appreciate the art" behind these fragrant masterpieces but most men and women haven't a clue that this perfume blogosphere exists. They walk into a department store or perfume discounter and buy what they honestly and truly like and what is popular. This is not neurosurgery, this is common sense. People buy Rare Pearls and Paris Hilton because they like how they smell not because they have come to comprehend the artistic vision of "le nez".
So fragrance manufacturers and marketers are you listening? Do not be swayed by the blog chorus of those looking for something rare and amazing. Pay attention to your current sales figures and satisfy your market. Your market does not want to remind their friends of that bleak Degas painting of absinthe addicts housed in the Musee d'Orsay in Paris. They want to smell sexy and clean.
Come on Estee Lauder and Coty, you can do it!
(And just in case you're listening those perfumistas you're courting frequently buy and live off samples, free samples, hundreds of them. The people you are looking for would not have the nerve to ask for a decant. They do not know what it is)